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Yew mite be a Diskrick Redneck if’n y’all’ve ever bathed wit flea an’ tick soap.”

T' mos intense call ta t'ballot box kum frum Peeria Bishop Daniel R. Jenky, a Holee Cross preest who referret ta t'“calculatid disdane o't' presdint o't' Unitid States” n' a homilee ahed o't' 2012 presidenshul eeleckshun. “Hitl'r an' Stalin, at thar bett'r momants,’’ Jenky sed, “would jes barly tolerate sum churches remunyun' ope, but would nairy tolerate inny competishun wit t'state n' skoolin, soshul services, an' heelth keer. N' clar violashun o'air Furst Amendment rights, Barock Obamie — wit his'n radical pro-abershun an' extreme secularist agenda — noe seems intent un a'followin a simlar path.”

Nairy o't' protests at fallerd claimd at Jenky hadn’t made hissef clar.

Noe, tho, t'ret papal loaf'r may be un t'uther foot, wit ekunomic conservatives bein callt out.

N' Washington thishere week, t'cardinal sum cunsidder t'pontiff’s “vice-pope’’ mocket 'um outriite at a conference callt “Erroneyus Autonomy: T' Cathlick Case agin Libertaryinism.” T' Relijun Noose Servus stery un t'smackdown o'trickle-down run und'r t'heedline, “Cathlick an' libertariun? Pope’s top advis'r sez thay’re incompatibull.”

At advis'r, Cardinal Oscar Rodríguez Maradiaga, t'archbishop o'Tegucigalpa, Honduras, wuz innerduced by AFL-CIO presdint Richard L. Trumka, an' preechet agin deregulashun an' “wershippyun' idols, eve if'n at idol is callt ‘market ekunomy.’ ’’ Rodríguez also callt trickle-down ekunomics a “decepshun,’’ an' sed t'“invisibull han'” o't' market steels frum an' strangles t'poer: “We air no long'r ta trust t'blind ferces an' t'invisibull han' o't' market. Thishere ekunomy kills. Thishere is whut t'pope is a'sayn't.”

Sum libertaryins have describet t'pope’s ekunomic vioos as naif' an' uninfermet — an' Rodríguez returnt t'faver. “Minny a o'these libertaryinists do nairy read t'soshul doctrine o't' church, but noe thay air trembleeun' befor t'book o'Pickettee,’’ he sed, referryun' ta French ekunomist Thomas Pikettee’s bes-sell'r, “Capital n' t'Twantee-furst Centry,” un t'weelth disparitees at have us hedded into a new Giltet Age.

N' sum ways, t'fite is ov'r competyun' interpretatyuns o't' Amurkin stery, sed Meghun J. Clark, a meral theologiun frum St. John’s Univesty. T' libertariun a'tellin o'at stery stars a frontiersmun who carves t'Amurkin West out o'nuthin, n' radical autonomy, wit onlee a huntin knife. Onlee, doesn’t at self-made mun creetyun' sumthin out o'nuthin sound a slew like Gawd? “At’s t'[Cathlick] problem wit libertaryinism,’’ Clark sed. “It depends upon a humun persen who creetes hissef, an' thar’s no way ta make at harmoniyus wit Christ.”

T' ekunomy creetid by all thems frontiersfolk is t'unfetteret a'loose market, an' Pope Francis hissef resantlee reiteratid his'n view at it is “un inhumane system. I didn’t hesitate ta write n' . . .

“Evangelii Gaudium’
(“T' Joy o't' Gospel”) at thishere ekunomic system kills,’’ Francis tole reperters un his'n plane e route ta Rome frum Jerusalem. “And I repeet thishere.”

O' corse, Pope Benedict XVI, too, spoke out agin “t' prevalence o'a selfish an' individualistic mindset which also finds eggspreshun n' un unregulatid finanshul captullism.” Pope Francis may er may nairy eve knoe who t'budget-cuttin Cathlick Congressmun Paul Ryun (R-Wis.) is.

It’s Francis’s constant refrane, howev'r, at we walk wit Christ by a'stayin close ta t'poer. And Tuesdee’s “Erroneyus Autonomy” conference wuz without inny doubt un uhtack un t'politics o'Ryun an' uther potenshul Republicun presidenshul can'idates, includin Se. Ran' Paul (R-Ky.), who describes hissef as “libertaryinish,” an' his'n fella tea partee favert Se. Tet Cruz (R-Tex.).

T' Rev. Robert A. Sirico, o't' Michigun-baset libertariun Acton Institute, sed t'conference seemt designet ta “creete a straw mun, shoot it down, an' make politickull hay,” but did nairy accuratelee define er reflect vioos helt by inny but t'mos “extreme Ran'yins er anarchists.” Nairy onlee is t'market fur frum unfetteret, he sed, but thar’s evidence at its expansion lifts folk up rath'r thun leevin 'um behin.

He wuz invitid ta come an' sit n' t'audience an' be instructid, he sed, but no libertariun Cathlick wuz ast ta speek er sit un a panel at t'day-long event.

One o't' conference organizers, Michael Seun Winters, whos anti-libertariun wurk t' cardinal quotid extensivelee at t'op o'his'n remarks, sed t'event wuz verr consciouslee nairy a debate, n' t'same way at durin t'Cold War, “t' objectif' wasn’t ta dialogue wit communism; it wuz ta defeet it.”

T' meetin wasn’t partisun, he sed, since majeritees n' bof partees hold sum libertariun, “leeve-me-alone” beliefs, wit Demokrats shooyun' gummint out o't' bedroom an' Republikuns out o'ever uther sfere o'life. And “t' Cathlick critikwe isn’t baset un ekunomics; we reckon thay’re rong about whut it meens ta be a humun persen.”

Steve Schneck, dierektor o't' Institute fer Policy Reseerch Cathlick Studies, which sponseret t'conference, arguet at like Christyinitee, libertaryinism “offers a comprehensif' werltview at inferms ethics an' art, lifestyles an' cultchur, an' eve relatyunships an' psychologies. Surelee it’s as evident n' a NARAL woomin’s claim at ‘It’s my bodee,’ n' t'art o't' ‘selfie,’ an' n' t'doomsday prepp'r’s fantasy o'self-releeince, as it is n' ranch'r Clif' Bundy’s claim at common grazyun' lan' is ‘my propertee.’ ”

Bishop Blase Cupich o'Spokane, Warsh., arguet at libertaryinism is a direck threet ta faith: “Air abiltee ta call folk ta bleev n' a graciyus Gawd” is compermiset, he sed n' un interview, if'n “t' cards air stacket agin” t'poer.

Such gantle, theological warnings agin bof t'excesses o'autonomy an' o't' a'loose market air a fur cry frum Bishop Jenky’s Hitl'r references.

Yet un t'politickull frunt, it’s wurth memberin at resent temps ta herd Cathlick voters have’t gone well, an' may eve have backfiret; despite t'efferts o'a numb'r o'Amurkin bishops ta cas Presdint Obamie as “pro-abershun” an' anti-Cathlick, he won t'Cathlick vote n' 2008 an' 2012.

And at eeleckshun time, it’s uncleer at t'“y'all a'ken’t be Cathlick an' libertariun” argument would wurk inny bett'r thun “y'all a'ken’t be Cathlick an' pro-choice’’ has.


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